How did it get so late so soon??

“How did it get so late so soon? Its night before its afternoon. December is here before its June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon?” dr. seuss

I have always loved this saying by Dr. Seuss. And once again, I find myself marveling at how the "time has flewn!"

I can hardly believe that our little girl is turning three this week. THREE. Three years old. People always tell you they don't stay little very long and that the time goes by so quickly but until you are actually wearing the parenting shoes - you really don't understand just how quickly time flies.
My how time flies. How DID it get so late so soon?
On some levels ~ being pregnant with H seems like ages ago, the twice weekly trips to the hospital for biophysical profiles & fetal non-stress tests, diabetes appointments and four times a day insulin injections...ah...what fun! Then, on the other hand, it seems like just last week we were saying prayers for our little blessing in the NICU ~
I feel like she literally morphed overnight from an 8 pound 3 oz newborn into this bike riding, toilet using, must dress herself, hates to have her hair brushed, lets you know exactly what she's thinking little girly girl.
It's been a ton of fun watching her over these last three years...the things she says and does, the things she learns, the things she shows us that I had no clue she knew!!

To hear her spell her name..."H-A-I-L-E-Y Hailey!" and then...when she does it again, it goes something like this...."H-A-I-L-E-Y-L-R-T-E, Hailey!" This little girl can melt my heart like butta...

Don't get me wrong...there have been many challenging days as well. Who knew a child so small could make a grown woman cry so hard...both tears of happiness and tears of...not sadness...but defeat? The overwhelming thoughts that come with trying to do it all and do it not just well but perfectly well...Those days are tough on me...the days where I don't "win" the battles (i.e.: what's for dinner, what time we go to bed) that I have chosen to fight that day. Where I hear the words - "I don't love you - I just love Daddy. You are not my friend and I'm not gonna play with you." I know she doesn't mean these things and it shouldn't hurt my heart but some days - some days it does. The days where I've gotten just three hours of interrupted sleep the night before, the days where my work is piling up at the office and I haven't had time to clean our house...it just takes her sweet little voice telling me "I don't love you I just love Daddy" to make the tears flow. Those are the days I question if I am doing a good job. All I want in this life is to be a great mom (and wife.)

Even still - I love this little girl with all of my heart and more. I am forever thankful that we have been given the opportunity to love and raise this little human being...We're blessed not just once but twice with her monkey-see monkey do little brother. I'm not sure if it's the fact that I'm older (just a little bit, not much) and wiser now or if I see more than I used to being an official mom ~ but I continually count my blessings as I share in the grief of many families around us who have "real" struggles. Struggles of sick children or spouses, or the struggle of having to deal with the death of a child or loss of a spouse. How on earth do the single parents do it...I have my husband right by my side and feel very, very overwhelmed on far too many days. My struggles of what time we go to bed or if we are having simply Doritos for dinner are nothing in comparison to the every day real life battles that far too many people have to deal with. I try every single day not to lose sight of that. Not to lose sight of what is important.

As we go forward into another year of this little girl's life - I will continue to be amazed by her each and every single day. And I love her more and more with every fiber of my being - even on the days where she flat out tells me she doesn't love me...is she 3 or 13??

how DID it get so late so soon?

There was the first birthday...in 2006

And the second birthday pictures for 2007





And now...She's...THREE!!